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Posted: May 12th, 2006 at 01:54 pm
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King Lear Act II scene ii
-William Shakespeare
OSWALD
Prithee, if thou lovest me, tell me.
KENT
I love thee not.
OSWALD
Why, then, I care not for thee.
KENT
If I had thee in Lipsbury pinfold, I would make thee care for me.
OSWALD
Why dost thou use me thus? I know thee not.
KENT
Fellow, I know thee.
OSWALD
What dost thou know me for?
KENT
A knave, a rascal, an eater of broken meats; a base, proud, shallow, beggarly, three-suited, hundred-pound, filthy, worsted-stocking knave; a lily-livered, action-taking knave; a whoreson, glass-gazing, super-serviceable finical rogue; one-trunk-inheriting slave; one that wouldst be a bawd in way of good service; and art nothing but the composition of a knave, beggar, coward, pander, and the son and heir of a mongrel bitch; one whom I will beat into clamorous whining if thou deniest the least syllable of thy addition.
Modern translation
OSWALD: Please, sir, if you love me, be kind to me and tell me.
KENT: I won't be kind to you.
OSWALD: In that case, I don't much care for you either.
KENT: If I could get my hands on you, I'd make you care.
OSWALD: Why are you talking to me like this? I hardly even know you.
KENT: Ah!.. but I know you.
OSWALD: Oh yeah, who am I then?
Kent: You're a lowlife, a rascal who eats leftover scraps. You're an ignoble, arrogant, shallow, vulgar, pretentious, conceited, filthy third-rate servant who thinks he's something special. You're a cowardly lawyer-loving bastard; a vain, brown-nosing, prissy scoundrel who'd pimp himself out to advance his career; a bag lady. You're nothing but a lowlife, a beggar, a coward, and a pimp, the son and heir of a mutt bitch. I'll beat you until you whine and cry if you deny the least bit of this.
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Why "Broken Meats"? - (Read 718 Times)
